Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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