My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
