Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize