i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Randomize
