so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
