Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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