u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
