So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
How external is "for external use only"?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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