theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Dear god my vagina.
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