sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
