shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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