eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
