Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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