I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize