your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
