im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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