i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
there is glitter all over my balls
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