i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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