Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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