Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
