Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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