Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Randomize
