He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
