So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
