I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Buhtt sex?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
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