So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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