11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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