If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
no. you can't hotbox the world.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
not ubering you a puppy
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
