wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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