yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
