Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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