Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
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