why didn't you poke me back
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
