i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
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