Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
