it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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