You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
