Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Randomize
