sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
