i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
