meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize