Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize