dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
