I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
