Just fell off a train. Bad.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
porn star boner night. come get it.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize