she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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