Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
