no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize