Your tits are I can't wait for
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
