when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
